Imagine the following scenario: we have an elections date and a law on which those elections will take place. All of our politicians who want to run for parliament are trying to get their beauty sleep before their major pre-electoral photo-shoot. Then, suddenly, they wake up at night with one thought on their mind.
- Boutros Harb: Do I have any white hair? DO I?
- Antoine Zahra: Damn it, I have to smile. I’ll look constipated one more time.
- Gebran Bassil: How do I turn this into a press conference?
- Whoever’s running with Gebran Bassil: [sleep apnea]
- Samer Saade: Conservative for Tripoli? Or more liberal pose for Batroun?
- Najib Mikati: to point or not to point at all the money that I’m going to use?
- Michel Aoun: WHOEVER’S GOING TO TAKE MY PICTURE WANTS TO ASSASSINATE ME.
- Samir Geagea: flower or deflower, flower or deflower, flower or deflower? Deflower! Certainly, certainly, certainly.
- Gilberte Zouein: They’re blowing me, right? My hair, I mean.
- Neamtallah Abi Nasr: I should kiss up to Michel Aoun in my picture right? Bring me his shoes!
- Saad Hariri: Hmm, Paris Eiffel in the background?
- Samy Gemayel: I need to make my poster better representative of minorities. Is there any unheard of minority in this country?
- Ahmad el Assir: I must connect to the non-extremists. I should probably weave my beard.
- Myriam Klink: Antawwww. *chuckles*
- Sethrida Geagea: I’m hot.
- Walid Jumblat: Aley and Chouf are mine. Mine. MINE!
- Ziad Baroud: Good thing the picture is a portrait.
Oh look at all those people I just offended. But wait – one more politician:
- Amir Fakhreddine: Did you vote for this blog?