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On International Women’s Day, a local website called the961.com decided to publish a list of 7 reasons why you should date Lebanese women.
As it is with Buzzfeed-esque lists that rely on stereotypes, generalizations and healthy doses of sexism-coated misogyny, the list of why you should consider a Lebanese women as your date range from her being “beautiful… supportive… family oriented… well dressed…” and, most importantly, that SHE CAN COOK! Again, on International Women’s Day, out of all days, the one day that women around the world call for their rights as loud as they can, scream against being objectified, and fight for gender equality.
I don’t know whose idea it was to publish a list of generics and think it’s a celebration of Lebanese women, when all it’s doing is annihilate every inch of evolution that the Lebanese women empowerment movement has accomplished over the years.
At a time when many Lebanese women are leading NGOs, being listed in Forbes as some of the most influential people around the world, challenging stereotypes left and right, forming start-ups, trying to break into politics, forming political movements, becoming reverends, their worth as people is sure as hell not defined in a silly list posted on some random website to get clicks and ad-money. There’s also a “why date Lebanese men” list too to serve that purpose.
So instead of a celebration of our women who are breaking boundaries in Lebanon, the Arab World and the entire world, it was decided to summarize them, in the only thing about them that’s worth dating, and that is being them standing behind their men, looking pretty and dressing well enough, as well as being able to cook for them.
The notion that no woman on this Earth is defined by any man seems to still escape many people, in 2017. So let’s say it loud and clear: Our women, Lebanese or otherwise, are not defined by what they can offer men, especially when they’ve been subdued by patriarchy for decades now, down to having our male parliament members vote down laws on sexual harassment in parliament because “it opens doors for us that we don’t want opened.”
Do you know why you should date a Lebanese woman? If she’s the gender you’re attracted to and you’re interested enough with what she has to offer you, then why don’t you?
To the women sharing that horrifying list, stop. It’s not a list that’s flattering you. It’s a list that keeps you in that box that many men, whereas Lebanese here or abroad, want to shove you in and keep you there.
It’s okay not to want kids.
It’s okay not to know how to cook.
It’s okay not to want to be anyone’s support and to put yourself first.
It’s okay not to dress the way society thinks you should be dressing and not to give any fucks about it.
Your self worth is not summarized in a silly list on a silly website. Any man who’s worth anything would know that.
If her not dressing in Chanel or looking like Gigi Hadid is a deal breaker, or is even a consideration as to why you’d consider having any person on Earth as your partner, then you’re the embodiment of the problem with men who don’t think there’s a problem with the stereotypes they’re perpetuating in the first place. Maybe you shouldn’t even be dating anyone to begin with.
A Separate State of Mind | A Blog by Elie Fares 
Reblogged this on Mikepouraryan’s Weblog and commented:
Some Beautiful Food For Thought…..
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Woo-hoo! You go sister! Best wake up call this morning. You are an inspiration.
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Stereotypes are firmly installed in our society, and women are not excluded from this thinking. Find me a lebanese woman who does not feel guilty because she is leaving home to go to….work to support her family! We need lots of work to be done to change thinking, beginning with women themselves; stop treating your sons as if they were masters and you a slave. Let them share responsibilities and be supportive very early. Then maybe they will stop treating their mothers and wives as maids and relationships will be based on dignity not on basic needs.
On Fri, 10 Mar 2017 2:36 PM A Separate State of Mind | A Blog by Elie Fares, wrote:
> eliefares posted: “Make sure you download this blog’s iOS app to stay up > to date! (Link). On International Women’s Day, a local website called > the961.com decided to publish a list of 7 reasons why you should date > Lebanese women. As it is with Buzzfeed-esque lists t” >
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To be honest, I hate that you mentioned the blog in your post. You only gave them traffic from people who are interested enough.
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I’ve been writing my comments here and for some reason you are not allowing it. bravo for the freedom of speech that you care so much about.
In case you do not post this, I will take things to the next level and make it personal. byi kaffe ba2a show some respect or you will show it by force. you choose.
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Te3tir wad3ak enta. You changed your name. I have to approve the comments again. Grow up w bala habalak.
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Let people know how selective you are in accepting comments on your posts.
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I accept everyone that is not spam. Case in point; your bullshit is online.
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ya khaliss, your bullshit has been here for some time now, its archived in most of your posts, just re-read, ur a fuckin hater and an attention hoe.. and this post proves it, u’ve taken things too far, bala hebale? la hbb, read your post and you will know the extent of ur habal. ur way too emotional and u get carried away very fast. you have nothing to do with reason, ur all about emotions. u tell me writer, i tell ur a cunt. i changed my name just in case the system recognize it (in case you deleted or blocked me, which I still think u did). I wrote more than 5 times stuff which you won’t be pleased about and it got deleted. coincidence? i dont think so. what a cunt!
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to be fair, not all ur posts, but some of them are utter bullshit! like this one. and let me tell you something, stop insulting people and treat them like shit, at the end of the day ur unprotected and easily accessible. dont you think that people dont know about u, where u live ects.. at the end of the day, u are so stupid that u insulted Berri (someone I hate and was happy that u did), someone who can kidnap and kick ur ass in a matter of seconds. that shows the extent of ur IQ. u want to show the size of ur balls, do it cleverly, and that means not insulting random people who actually follow u. thats the biggest form of disrespect. insulting ur followers or insulting clients. thats plain stupid. what if u take it further and i kick ur ass for disrespecting tens of people behind ur computer screen?
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ur file is now with Hezeb, I have nothing to do with them but I contacted someone I know in the organization and informed them of ur little adventures in Baalbek. Keep on insulting people online until you get ur ass kicked. And I won’t sleep at ease until you do. te3tir wade3e ana? men shouf wada3 min te3tir lama yes7abouk min baytak. ur character pisses me off, you think u’re the man when everything you say you are is untrue, you show no respect to people, and you will pay for it. ayre bi mowtek I hope to take a piss on their grave one day.
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