Why The Lebanese Government Is Silent On Tripoli

Every once in a while, the city I once referred to as “3enna” by mistake becomes a place I force myself to go the extra mile to recognize.
The last time such heavy fights broke out in the city, we were all in outrage at how media couldn’t care less about the people dying and the innocent lives in danger. Today, the outrage over Tripoli’s worst night since the Civil War is gravitating towards a government that is as apathetic as apathy goes.

However, are we supposed to expect anything more from our government? Tripoli’s Ministers and MPs go on air to voice their disdain and condemnation over what’s going on. What’s actually happening, though, is that in the other side of the room is one of their henchmen waiting on a phone to issue further instructions to the fighters on both sides of the battles.

Najib Mikati feigns peace. But he probably has men fighting. Mohammad el Safadi feigns innocence. But he probably has men fighting too. Have you ever seen how Bab el Tebbane worships Kabbara? Why do you think that is? You don’t have to over think it really.

The solution for Tripoli isn’t political. If it were, all those politicians asking for calm and peace would have succeeded by now. The problem is that those same politicians want to perpetuate the status quo, because this status quo works and does wonders for them and their careers.
It keeps the city poor for them to do their “charity” work.It keeps the city relevant politically for them to make a “political” dent and remain in the country’s political spotlight.

Perhaps the solution for Tripoli is for a side of the battle to actually win. Perhaps the problem in this country is that we have never had a clear winner and a clear loser in anything, not elections, not the war and not even those sporadic battles in Tripoli which we’ve gotten used to.

Until then, my thoughts go to all the people spending their days and nights in absolute terror in the city I’ve come to love, a place that doesn’t deserve the hand it’s dealt.

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How I Lost 30 Kilos

Around December of 2012, as I was sitting in the back of my friend’s coupé, the idea of starting a diet was running through my mind. It had been running for several days. When we reached our destination and I was supposed to get out of the car, I had the worst back pain of my life. I had to use my friend as support to walk. It’s not a nice thing to go through when she’s half your size.

As a 23 year old, few conditions can give me that. With no relevant family history for other conditions, I was sure it was my weight. My new year resolution was then to lose all those extra kilos posing a daily risk for increased health problems.

On January 3rd, a Thursday, upon returning from class, I decided to visit a local dietitian in Batroun called Mira Moussa. I weighed in at 118 kilos and at almost 6 feet in height, it was way above any form of acceptable value. I started the diet then after a December which was filled with junk food, Hard Rock Cafe and Roadster Diner.

My diet wasn’t too difficult even though I was told I’d find trouble adjusting at first. A few days of hunger later, I was getting in the zone. I still craved cheat food back then but I did my best not to cave. Being in Batroun with very few options to cheat definitely helped although I did indulge in the occasional burger at Crepaway or Lebanon’s best pizza at Royal.

The diet itself wasn’t restrictive. I actually restricted it more because there were so many allowed items that I didn’t eat. But there was nothing off limits. The fatty stuff could be eaten but in very small portions. I eventually decided to make do without them. I’d rather eat something I like which is fulfilling and can keep me going all day.

The weight started dropping. I lost 4 kilos in the first 2 weeks, which was expected given the change my body was going through. But I had to stick more to my diet for the weeks that followed. If you thought cheating once per week was permissible then you haven’t seen the effect it has on the weight you lose. Whenever I didn’t cheat, the weight drop I had made me proud. Whenever I cheated, be it just one Roadster meal, the weight drop would become negligible.

Soon enough, I decided to drop those guilt meals that I used to work as incentive for. Food was no longer a reward I longed to, as much as it became something that I enjoyed but didn’t work to get. My menu-choice at my favorite places changed as well. Instead of going towards the diner mites at Roadster, I’d go to the light burgers which are absolutely awesome. And with decreasing eating out, the amount of money that I saved was really high. I learned that, even if you had refrained from food all day, indulging in a super meal would beat the purpose. A smaller and lighter meal would fill you up just the same and would be so much better for your body.

And the weight kept dropping. I’d lose 3 kilos for a couple of weeks then 1 kilo the two weeks that followed. But I never let it bring me down. The weight loss eventually became more motivating and more regular as I stuck with my diet more and more.
I knew things changed around late March when I dropped below the 100kilos mark. My friend took me out to celebrate and I got convinced to try out my favorite burger at Roadster: the diner mite 220. And not only was I more than stuffed halfway through, I simply didn’t enjoy it as much as I did before. This burger which was barely enough to fill me up before was something I wouldn’t consider again.

Once people start noticing you losing the weight and the compliments start pouring in, it fuels you to keep up. Those who say people don’t matter are kidding themselves. Once you start seeing your old jeans becoming like maternity clothes on you and jeans you hadn’t worn in years suddenly fit, your motivation to keep going grows more and more.

Once the fat folds start going away and your face starts acquiring a form that isn’t double-chinned round, your confidence also starts increasing. It’s not about the body image that media wants you to have. It’s about you becoming more comfortable in your own skin because it simply feels like a much better skin to be in. And I felt healthier. I could walk for longer durations, I could do more things than before. For instance, I don’t mind walking around Achrafieh now that I’ve moved back for my last two years of medical education. I’d rather walk to Beirut Souks if the weather permits than actually take a taxi there. That wasn’t the case when I was ElieX1.5. I haven’t tried out the gym yet but I intend to do that once I’ve hit my target weight, a few kilos from now.

At one point, my friends started telling me I was taking it too far. And in a way I did. I was comfortable with how things were going but I definitely saw how annoying it was to be the only one not eating at a table or the only one worried about eating once we went out to some place that didn’t have a “light” menu I could choose from.

Many had asked if I opted in for a surgery to drop the weight. I never considered it. Any form of surgery in that regards was, to me, the easy way out of a mess I put myself into. It was also a major surgery that I didn’t want to put my body through especially when I had another option I didn’t test out. I know people who went for surgery when diet failed them. But I learned during the time since I started dieting that those people also gave themselves a very loose range of cheating. Taking pills before a Sunday meal or taking the day off from a diet just because you visited the dietitian on that day definitely defeats the purpose. It’s not a punishment as much as it is you changing into a new way of eating and looking at food. At least that was what I learned. It’s akin to all those people who visit physicians, get instructions, and never follow them because they don’t feel like it and then somehow blame the physician.

Despite it all, I kept looking at myself as a fat person. I had gotten used to that notion for such a long time that leaving it behind would prove troublesome no matter how thin people say you are. After all, people can over-compliment sometimes and this is Lebanon. You can never really know who’s kissing up. The click of me not looking at myself as a fat person anymore came very recently: this past Sunday. I had reached a point where I desperately needed to buy new clothes. Belts and whatnot didn’t cut it anymore. So I went shopping, something I despise. Surprisingly, things started fitting. I fit into “skinny” jeans that I didn’t buy. But I fit in them! And instead of going for the size 38 jeans, I fit in size 32. The T-shirts that I bought were size medium. But it wasn’t until I was passing by one of the mirrors at that store and I saw my legs that I stopped dead in my tracks and asked: is this a thinning mirror?
My friend said no, this is how you look. And the person staring back at me was not a fat person at all.

The triumph of year 2013 so far wasn’t only the weight drop but how I think I changed the more the kilos were shed. And I, Elie Fares, am not a fat person anymore.

This wouldn’t be complete without a before-after picture:

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Untold Stories of Rape in Lebanon

I didn’t know prior to yesterday that many people thought stories of rape couldn’t possibly go undetected for years. I didn’t know prior to yesterday that somehow I lived in my own version of Lebanese reality where I’m exposed to little tidbits of everything that most of us hear about in theory, in realms of fiction we never think would happen to people who are close to us in any way.

News of rape attempts surfaced frequently over the past few days. Some were verified (link), others are still just stories and may have been made up, causing a disservice to every single person out there in this country still feeling the sting of the pain but going through their days anyway.

Because there’s this notion that rape in Lebanon, and possibly other countries, surfaces quickly and cannot go unnoticed for a long period of time, I will be going up close and personal with the stories of two people I know personally very well. Only those few people who are deeply familiar with their story will know who they are. But the following stories are 100% accurate and have happened here, around every single one of us.

Story #1:

She was sitting in Deir l Salib with her psychiatrist facing her, asking her all the questions she never thought she’d have to answer. When did it start? 1997. How did it start? He was her employer. What did he do? So many things.
She remembered the first time he forced himself on her. How he threatened her he’d hunt down her family members with his influence if she ever dared speak. She remembered how she’d come to the office and see him naked on the couch, his semen all over the carpet. He had just had a prostitute over. She remembered as he forced her to clean the mess. She remembered as he peed on the carpet as she cleaned. She remembered holding back the tears.
She remembered all the weddings she didn’t go through. She remembered feeling excited about those invitation cards, doing her hair and painting her nails only to get a phone call prohibiting her from attending… Or else. She’d fight with her family in order to get them not to want to take her with them anymore. There was nothing else she could do.
She remembered all the possible marriages that passed by her over the year. She remembered the physician who lived in Canada and found her to be of exquisite beauty. She remembered turning him down because he wouldn’t let her go.
1997 was when it started. 2009 was when she cracked. 12 years has turned her in into a different woman, a different person. She wouldn’t be the same ever again.

Story #2:

He was a seven year old student at one of the country’s many primary schools. He was anything but calm, constantly finding himself in trouble. He raised his hand and asked his teacher for permission to use the restroom. She dismissed him. He hopped his way to the bathroom, entered the cubicle and stood there as a middle aged man faced him with a menacing look on his face.
The little boy tried to escape him but couldn’t. The man grabbed the boy, cupped his mouth so he wouldn’t scream and unzipped his pants.
The boy couldn’t remember anything of what happened afterwards. The man threatened him in order to keep quiet. He returned to class with pee all over his pants. He tried to hide it but couldn’t. His class made fun of him and he sat there crying because there was nothing else he could do.
When he got home, he snuck past his mother and spilled water on his pants to hide the stain. He then threw it in with the laundry. She would never know. And he didn’t tell anyone what happened with him that day. He didn’t know if they’d understand. He didn’t know if they’d believe him. He didn’t know if they’d help.
He held his story in and didn’t tell it to anyone until he turned 23.

That woman and that boy know they can’t get their past back in order to have a different version of their future and present. And here we are telling them that we live in a place where we really can’t do anything for them, where they’ll just have to make do with the hand they’re dealt. Because that’s how things simply are.

LAU Professor Accused Of “Raping” Student & His Response

Following the news of a rape attempt in Hamra (link), another rape story surfaced online involving an LAU professor, aged 62, and his 19 year old student of whom he allegedly took advantage for over 4 years.

According to the following picture circulating online (picture), the man was supposedly never caught during those four years and managed to resign before his university found out.

The plot thickens. The professor in question has now responded to the girl who started the whole online campaign, which was picked up by various websites and news outlets.

This is his response:

Alexandra has published her fabricated allegations against me on facebook and other sites on the internet. Kindly see below my response:

  • Since I was certain of Alexandra’s academic and creative capabilities, I gave her a great deal of time and supervised three of her novels: 2 in Arabic and one in English. My motto was to work with talented beginners and help them produce their own works of fiction.
  • I was the one who encouraged her to pursue her studies and I wrote her a letter of recommendation to Yale University which is still in my possession. I do not understand how one encourages a person to study abroad, and controls and confines this same person at the same time.
  • She sent me the paper she had prepared for a conference in Switzerland (April 2012) and we discussed it at length on Skype.
  • This woman used to call me every day over the period of 4 years, yes every single day to talk about her problems. I used to help her to the best of my abilities. She used to call me daily from America (and Germany) to ask questions or talk about her problems. This went on for four years, summer and winter, day and night. I always thought this was a passing phase related to growing up that will soon subside. I was sincerely happy to think that she would excel in her work and that I would be one of those who contributed to her success especially after she had written her three novels.
  • She told me that she was having a relation with a woman and asked my opinion of this. My answer was: You are free to realize yourself the way you think fit.
  • She told me several times on the phone after a few months of her relation that her companion is so possessive and is almost suffocating her and that she does not know how to free herself of her.
  • She also used to tell me of her relations with men and women (I still remember the names and nationalities). She considered me as her confidante and her counselor.
  • I wonder what has happened and why she is lying. Why is she falsifying the truth? Why has she showered all terms related to rape on me (she is Lebanon’s champion in Tai Boxing)? I have a documented answer to be published at the right time.
  • I am sorry that it has come to this. Alexandra is in trouble, but her harassment has become unbearable. I have so far refrained from responding to her accusations because I am sorry for her parents and would have liked to spare them. I so much wanted to meet them but she refused to introduce me as she hated them to the death. She also alleged certain things about her father that is improper for me to mention now.
  • I have asked a lawyer to raise a case against her for libel and defamation because certain innocent people may believe her allegations especially that she pretends to be a lamb in the claws of a wild animal.
  • I still have all the electronic messages that she sent me over the four-year period and will publish them in due time whenever the need arises.
  • Finally, there are a large number of documents, letters, photographs in my possession that can also be published if needed.

I am not one of those who think the fishiest part of the story is the girl staying silent for four years. However, the outrage on the matter was also perhaps warranted because of the system that makes sure any girl whose sanctity was violated by any man will rarely find justice from that system and even her community.

This whole story will come down to the following: his words versus hers. I am not sure if the girl was referring to herself as the victim in the picture that she started circulating online but, in case she turns out to have fabricated the entire thing for attention, she would have severely damaged the cause of so many women around Lebanon who may have not yet found the courage to speak about real rape incidents and would be deterred by the so-many people that will think they are the girls who cried wolf just like she did.

I’d say let’s leave it to investigations but I’m not sure the story will develop further than this.

The Cost of Running An Ad on Lebanese TV During A Lebanese Politician’s Interview

MTV hosted Michel Aoun on Walid Abboud’s show “Bi Mawdou3iya” yesterday and he discussed the current debacle in the country regarding the electoral law and whatnot.

So because we live in extremely sensitive times, Lebanon’s main political foe for Michel Aoun is, naturally, going to seek out airtime as well. Samir Geagea will be on “Bi Mawdou3iya” as well tomorrow, all to MTV’s delight.

This isn’t about what both politicians want to discuss (or not discuss). It’s not about their propositions and constant tug-of-war leading nowhere. In order to announce the episode, I stumbled on the picture that follows.
The most interesting part of the picture to me was the cost to run an ad on MTV during Samir Geagea’s show. Two 30 second ads can cost you up to $5000.

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Every single second of commercial break is probably sold by now. This is how much audience our politicians bring in. Too bad there’s absolutely no tangible and efficient measures that are brought with them and the income they bring to the TV stations they appear on.

Lebanese Startup “Transterra Media” Among World’s Most Unlikely Successes

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Mashable has compiled a list of 25 startup companies at unlikely places around the world and a Lebanese startup called Transterra Media came in on the list at #23.

According to their website (link), the startup aims at redefining the way news is communicated by providing outlets with pictures and material straight out of from the scene.

I don’t know why Mashable considers Lebanon an unlikely place for such a news-centric startup to flourish. If anything, isn’t reporting news from where everything happens the best way to make a dent and cause a ripple? And in more general terms, haven’t many Lebanese startups also managed to become successful?

Either way, congrats to the people running Transterra Media for the recognition. Hopefully other local startups get noticed on a global scale as well soon.

Ministry of Culture To Buy Land & Save Lebanon’s Oldest Church in Downtown Beirut?

Source: The Beirut Report

Source: The Beirut Report

The site in Downtown Beirut, which is called “The Landmark” and at which a future hotel and mall were to be built, turned out to be an archeological jewel for Lebanon, unveiling three very important entities:

  1. A Roman gate,
  2. The old Roman road,
  3. Lebanon’s possibly oldest church (source).

I wrote on the issue yesterday. The matter has since made the rounds online. And it seems we’ve made a ripple. Lebanon’s ministry of culture is now considering to purchase the land where “The Landmark” is to be built because of its historical importance according to the following source (link – Arabic).

While the news is definitely welcome, I have to wonder – is it really Lebanese-like to have a ministry with a proven track record – the Roman hippodrome, Phoenician port and Amin Maalouf’s house are all destroyed – somehow respond this fast to demands and act on them? Isn’t it all too fast and too efficient to actually be plausible taking into consideration Lebanese standards?

Perhaps this whole “land purchase” deal is a decoy in order to calm down everyone whilst the real plans go underway. It’s not a conspiracy theory as much as it is the reality of a place like Lebanon where such things happen almost all the time. The question to be asked though: what truly got the ministry of culture to act this time while they didn’t regarding other sites despite all of them getting the same attention and vocal opposition to the demolitions?

It’s quite simple, in my opinion. “The Landmark” land has had a Church discovered in it. Prior to the discovery of the Church, and even though the Roman gate and road were both potentially discovered, the ministry of culture had no problem leaving the project underway and everything demolished in the process (source). But when a church comes into play, can a “Christian” minister truly leave the place be especially with so many “rights” at stake lately? It’s not about “culture” at all.

Ancient churches obviously trump everything else in archeological importance. And quite honestly, it was probably really smart to add a “Church” twist to the affair in order to get people – including the minister – to act. Can you imagine the even bigger outrage if the Church wasn’t saved?

Moreover, isn’t it despicable for us to now start hoping religion factors into the undiscovered aspects of our history in order to have a decent chance at having them saved, documented and potentially turned into a viable economical outlet that doesn’t require their demolition?

Based on a comment on my post regarding the matter (link), a law in Lebanon actually exists in order to protect ancient ruins from the claws of real estate and developmental projects with no other aim but blind money. The law in question was put into action prior to the civil war and hasn’t probably been put on hold akin to our new driving law.

Shouldn’t a country as archeologically rich as Lebanon, and a city with layers upon layers of history such as Beirut, have devised a method by now in order to accommodate the need for contemporary development with the need to also preserve history? How did cities like Rome and Athens manage to move into the 21st century? I guess it all comes down to the basic flaw in everything Lebanese: we never, ever, have a plan and a vision for a future.

How will the moguls behind “The Landmark” take the news that their entire investment will now go to waste? Is this even charted territory for us whereby the billionaire developers don’t get their way – in theory at least?

I hope for its sake that the next site to be unearthed in Beirut has some Umayyad mosque in it.