Driving in Lebanon

It’s no wonder Lebanon has the highest amount of “credible” psychics in the world. It’s a simple manifestation of Darwin’s theory of natural selection. How so? Let me elaborate.

When you drive in Lebanon, you need to have a sixth sense in order to survive – a sense that lets you anticipate what the other drivers around you decide to do so you react accordingly.

What’s the point of using blinkers to signal going left or right? just swerve out of the left lane to go into an alley that branches out of the right lane, which happens to be three lanes away. And you know other drivers aren’t bothered by this because, well, they probably knew you were going to do it.

Or for instance when you’re going the speed limit and you see a car heading at you like a rocket. You know it’s time to change lanes, even though you’re not breaking any law, in order not to be inundated with a torrent of curses and have the other car harass you till either one of you get to their destination.

Another example would be someone deciding to suddenly stop in the middle of the road or go at a snail’s pace on the highway’s left lane. Anyone would be surprised by this behavior – except a Lebanese.

You also need this sixth sense to let you known the location of potholes you need to avoid in order not to break your car. After all, potholes in our roads are used for scientific experiments studying the surfaces near the Earth’s core.

Moreover, this sixth sense is often coupled with an ability for super sight, since our roads are mostly dimmer than the dark side of the moon.

It all comes down to this. If a person doesn’t have this “psychic” sixth-sense, they die on Lebanese roads, leaving only the “stronger” bunch of us, who have this sixth sense, alive. Meaning, in the not so distant future, the number of Lebanese people deciding, on New Year’s Eve, to entertain everyone with predictions about the upcoming year will exhibit an exponential growth in number.

Until then… enjoy driving in Lebanon.

4 thoughts on “Driving in Lebanon

  1. Pingback: David Letterman on Driving in Beirut « A Separate State of Mind

  2. Pingback: Lebanese Memes: Blinkers « A Separate State of Mind

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