Tag Archives: Lebanon

Lebanon Bans Iranian Movie “Green Days”

I honestly do not get Lebanon these days – or maybe I do and don’t want to admit that our newly formed government is as uptight and horrible as we thought it would be, but the Iranian movie “Green Days” has been banned from being screened in the country.

What is the movie about? The 2009 Iranian protests against Ahmadinejad.

The movie “Green Days” was directed by Hana Makhmalbaf, aged 22, daughter of Mohsen Makhamalbaf, who is close to Iranian opposition leader Mir Hossein Mousavi, whose followers led the 2009 protests. A General Security personnel in Lebanon said the ban was fulfilled after a request from the Iranian minister in Lebanon.

Since when does a request by an ambassador actually get fulfilled in Lebanon? Especially if it’s something as silly as them asking to ban a movie that details the regime they represent in a hideous light? It’s nice to see Iran’s main allies in Lebanon looking after their love’s interests over here. After all, why should Lebanese be allowed to watch a movie that details Iranian protests? I think that’s something Khamenei banned, no? Therefore, we should not be allowed to watch it! What an abomination that would be to our souls and to the good of the glorious nation of Iran!

But wait! Isn’t Lebanon a mutlicultural country where the say of one group or sect shouldn’t apply to the rest of the people? You’d think Mr. Orange, carefully looking out for the “best interests of Christians”, would stand up against such an atrocity. You’d think the “best interest of Christians” would be them exposed to all the different cultures the world has to offer. Guess now we know who’s truly ruling the country, regardless of how many ministers they have in our awesome new government.

I don’t know about you but I shall be downloading this movie (along with subtitles) and making a few copies to distribute just to spite the ambassador and the holy Lebanese resistance whose only job these days, by the looks of it, is to ban movies. How does that work against Israel again?

Happy Fathers’ Day

It is the summer solstice and also fathers’ day in Lebanon.

My dad and I are, for lack of a better description, gunpowder and fire. Whenever we clash, things are going to explode. It could be because we’re more alike than we both want to admit.

My dad is a great man. And these last few weeks have only proven to me how lucky I am to have him as my father. Be it when I hugged him to say so and he almost cried or when he stood with his sister for their brother/sister wedding shot and they both chocked up.

My dad is a mountain of feelings that are always hidden beneath a surface of might. He always aims to give us the best life he can, even though that’s not always a possibility in a country like Lebanon. But the words: “you don’t need to worry about anything, whatever you want, just ask” are always coming out of his mouth.

I remember a night this winter when it was almost snowing in my hometown and my dad had to go fix the family’s main source of income. He begged my mom not to let me go with him but I went. I couldn’t have imagined any person going through that night alone. Imagine being out in freezing temperatures as the wind howls and rain/snow pours on you.

I am who I am today because a great man like him had a hand in raising me. My dad has his faults. But for what it’s worth, his faults make me love him even more.

And the fact that his birthday also happens to be on Fathers’ Day is not a coincidence. So to my awesome dad, happy birthday and happy fathers’ day.

Alfa and MTC Announce New Prepaid Packages

Lebanese Mobile Carriers Alfa and MTC have announced new packages for prepaid lines and they feature decent cuts on pricing.

Alfa has revealed the new lineup via its website, and called the new line: Waffer (Lebanese for save-up). You’ll get the chance to buy a new Alfa line for $4.55 and apply the new plans to it, or apply the new plans to your existing line.

The plans are as follows:

Starter: $10 per month for 30 minutes of talk.

Medium package: $16 per month for 60 minutes of talk.

“Heavy” package: $30 per month for 120 minutes of talk.

There are also reductions on SMS pricings. Peak and off peak prices apply as well.

MTC’s packages are also of similar nature, after all our telecom sector is a monopoly.

The interesting thing to note is that these are packages, not new recharge cards. Meaning, they do not go hand in hand with the current packages we all use: you cannot add your existing credit to them, nor can you add up credit while using them. You cannot also transfer credit to a needy friend. Moreover, if you run out of credit, you cannot recharge your line. You need to wait until your 30 days are up. So seriously, what’s the point? Prices reduction but limiting service? Why couldn’t they simply reduce the price on current packages and not introduce new ones?

Lebanon’s New Government

Congrats fellow Lebanese who might read this, we now have a government.
Regardless of its unipolitical color and the 5 month labor it went through to get here, we can now say that we are no longer governmentless.

And since 5 months without government render you immune to the overall uselessness of the whole process, let’s all deem the government formation a big fat fail.

1) It is a one-sided government, meaning the political struggle between both sides in the country was irrelevant to its formation.

2) It took 5 months for people among the same “team” to agree on forming the cabinet. 5 months for them to agree on 30 names. It took less to form the government with both sides included after the 2009 parliamentary elections.

3) The former opposition calls upon itself reform and change. Change is there: I’ve never heard some of those names before. And congrats to those new ministers. They will have a constant monthly paycheck till the day they die. Also, congrats to those people that made the governmental selection yet again. I mean, could you imagine a government without Ghazi Aridi as the minister of public works? Hello no! Reform, indeed.

4) There are more pro-Syria ministers in the new Lebanese cabinet than there will be in the theoretical Syrian government to be formed by Bashar Assad in Syria.

5) A few hours after the announcement of this glorious formation, two ministers have already submitted their resignations. Were they not aware they were going to be assigned? Apparently not. What’s the word (or acronym) to say here? Yes, LOL! Quoting my friend Boulos, “civil war cabinets have lasted more than this!”

It’s getting bigger. The fail is getting bigger.

So yeah, let us be happy today that the orange, yellow, green and other irrelevant people found it in them to stop the cockfight and form a government. Useless as it is and contradictory as it may be to the will of the people, we now have one. Insert fireworks show.

200 Km/h

I woke up today to the news that a friend of mine had passed away at 4 am on Sunday, June 12th.

Age? 31. Cause of death: Car accident. Approximate car speed: 200 km/h

The man’s neighbors woke up to the sound of his mom weeping and shouting. So the next time you and your friends decide to race on a Lebanese highway going at a ridiculous speed, at least have a flashback to your mother’s face and how devastated she would be if you were no longer there to speak to her, hug her or kiss her cheek.

My friend’s car went into a collision with an SUV. It was a convertible BMW and he didn’t have his seat-belt on. He got propelled over forty meters on the tarmac, out of the car.

So a word of advice for the next time you decide to turn your car into a space shuttle wannabe: don’t. Or at least put the seatbelt on – unless you’re experimenting with human projectiles.